sekuhara

[Dkid]

sexual harassment!

naging biktima na ba kayo nito?
o feeling mo na harassed ka na ba?

kelan nyo po ba masasabi na ang ginawa ng isang tao ay maaring isang sexual harassment?

Dito po kasi sa japan, parang taboo ang topic na to. Kahit na alam na ng gobyerno na etoy malalang problema, di parin masyadong tinugunan ng pansin. Parang gumamit lang sila ng band aid pang "lunas" daw ng sugat. Di tulad ng kung may isyo tungkol sa mga foreign nationals, mabilis pa sa alas kwatro ang response. Bakit di nila kayang gumawa ng tulad ng ginawa ng Amerika na "Article VII of the Civil Rights Act"? Kung saan malinaw na nilalahad ang isyo, what to do, at penalties ng harasser.

Despite the widespread publicity about the perils of sexual harassment, surveys demonstrate that many businesses operating in Japan have yet to address the problem. Moreover, recent news reports indicate that sexual harassment has reached the highest levels of management. Although businesses know it exists, they appear unsure of what to do about it. As a result, the specter of employer liability for sexual harassment continues to loom over the workplace. For years, sexual harassment victims who sought relief found themselves in a legal quandary. Legislation was on the books to protect employees from sexual harassment, but the benefits for pursuing such a case are few. Often, victims who spoke out jeopardized their jobs, their careers, and their reputation, with little reward. That is probably why most prefer to keep their case in themselves, that may sometimes send a wrong message to the culprits. A few are quite lucky to change jobs and managed to leave the angst of the past.

[jhunex]

Well....sexual harrasment is really a big issue not only here in Japan but throughtout the world.

What is the reason why some people are driven to do such an act despite the fact that every country has a strict rule for that?

Maybe the answer can be find out by studying the root cause or the origin of this sexual problem.So here is a presentation that may give us or lead us to answer on how this sexual problem exist in our world.
Cause of Human Conflict (http://www.unification.org/slides/fall00.htm)

If we will not be able to search the root cause of the problem concerning sexual behavior and stop it or prevent it, eventhough the whole country has a strick policy on that still some people will be driven to do that and maybe one of the member of our family, friends or relatives might be the victim.

I hope the presentation will give us some realization about sexual misconduct.:)

[Tonyang]

Salamat sa diskusyong ito. Unang tanong. Anu-anong instance ang tatawaging sexual harrassment?

Example pag tinitingnan ka at nababastusan ka sa tingin dahil tinitingnan ang hinaharap mo palagi, paano mo ipalalabas na sexual harrassment ito? O kaya naman aktong nagkamali kunwari pero actually nanantsing at iyung biktima di makasigaw o makalaban dahil structured o malinis iyung akto.

Paano ang ganito?

[Dkid]

Salamat sa diskusyong ito. Unang tanong. Anu-anong instance ang tatawaging sexual harrassment?

Example pag tinitingnan ka at nababastusan ka sa tingin dahil tinitingnan ang hinaharap mo palagi, paano mo ipalalabas na sexual harrassment ito? O kaya naman aktong nagkamali kunwari pero actually nanantsing at iyung biktima di makasigaw o makalaban dahil structured o malinis iyung akto.

Paano ang ganito?

yun din po sana ang gusto kung malaman sa mga members, kelan nila masasabing, ang gawa ng isang tao ay isang uri ng sexual harassment?
mababasa mo sa mga news items yung mga sinasabi ng iba, na eto ay ganitot ganun. halimbawa:uncwelcome sexual advances, requesting sexual favors, verbal or physical conduct of a sexual nature when this conduct explicitly or implicitly affects an individual's employment, or creates an intimidating, hostile, or offensive work environment, etc.etc.

medyo mahirap din kasing mag draw ng line kung saan?
pede din po kasi na same sex ay nahaharassed.
pede rin sa school mangyayari eto.
pede rin hindi ka directly naharassed, pero you are affected by the offensive conduct of others,etc.etc.

kaya, tanong ko po sana sa mga members kung alin, o ano, o kung kelan natin masasabing tayo ay na sexually harassed.

[Tonyang]

yun din po sana ang gusto kung malaman sa mga members, kelan nila masasabing, ang gawa ng isang tao ay isang uri ng sexual harassment?
mababasa mo sa mga news items yung mga sinasabi ng iba, na eto ay ganitot ganun. halimbawa:uncwelcome sexual advances, requesting sexual favors, verbal or physical conduct of a sexual nature when this conduct explicitly or implicitly affects an individual's employment, or creates an intimidating, hostile, or offensive work environment, etc.etc.

medyo mahirap din kasing mag draw ng line kung saan?
pede din po kasi na same sex ay nahaharassed.
pede rin sa school mangyayari eto.
pede rin hindi ka directly naharassed, pero you are affected by the offensive conduct of others,etc.etc.

kaya, tanong ko po sana sa mga members kung alin, o ano, o kung kelan natin masasabing tayo ay na sexually harassed.

Basta offensive yung act at di normal. Ang biktima lang ang makakaalam nito. Ang puwede nating tutukan dito, paano ang preventive measure nito para makaiwas at kung nangyayari, paano ihahabla ng di nakakailang o di mahina ang loob dahil may masamang ginagawa?

Example... situational. Halimbawa, opposite sex ang gumagawa nito at babae ang biktima tapos ang location ay sa loob ng opisina. Ang lokasyon ng lalaki ay malapit sa daanan na lilikuan o iikutan ng mga nasa opisina kaya ang babaeng kunsunada ay dumadaan din. Ang lalaking ito ay may paraan para titigan o magparamdam ng kabastusan sa babae maaaring sa pag-ikot niya at sabay pagharap ng mukha ng lalaki kaya tatapat sa hinaharap ng babae (I am sure nakukuha ninyo itong sitwasyon) o kaya naman, kunwari'y nagbabasa at biglang itataas ang ulo na kunwari'y sabay sa pag-ikot o pagdaan ng babae na saktong-sakto o kaya nama'y paghuli ng pagtitig sa likuran ng babae. Isang beses, mapapagbigyan mo pa dahil siguro nagagandahan pero kung habitual at kasama mo sa trabaho, bastos iyun at dapat mong hulihin sa akto.

Anong tingin mo Dkid?

[Dkid]

Example... situational. Halimbawa, opposite sex ang gumagawa nito at babae ang biktima tapos ang location ay sa loob ng opisina. Ang lokasyon ng lalaki ay malapit sa daanan na lilikuan o iikutan ng mga nasa opisina kaya ang babaeng kunsunada ay dumadaan din. Ang lalaking ito ay may paraan para titigan o magparamdam ng kabastusan sa babae maaaring sa pag-ikot niya at sabay pagharap ng mukha ng lalaki kaya tatapat sa hinaharap ng babae (I am sure nakukuha ninyo itong sitwasyon) o kaya naman, kunwari'y nagbabasa at biglang itataas ang ulo na kunwari'y sabay sa pag-ikot o pagdaan ng babae na saktong-sakto o kaya nama'y paghuli ng pagtitig sa likuran ng babae. Isang beses, mapapagbigyan mo pa dahil siguro nagagandahan pero kung habitual at kasama mo sa trabaho, bastos iyun at dapat mong hulihin sa akto.

Anong tingin mo Dkid?

Sa tingin ko, etoy isang uri ng sexual harassment at dapat managot ang manyakis na to.
I think, nakasaad eto sa article VII ng batas ng amerika. Di lang po ako sigurado sa mga detalye kung paano eto i prove sa korte.

Sa palagay ko, ang magandang gawin, ay i report sa personnel management ang incident. Dahil kung gagawa ng hakbang ang management, kahit after ilang months o years pa ang lumipas, seguradong they will go over the records. "Kung walang report, walang crime" eto ang maging lusot ng management. Hindi dahil pagtakpan nila yung culprit, most probably, they don't want to jump on a quite expensive situation. Pede ring gusto nilang umiwas sa domino effect nito. For sure, after the investigation, legislation follows, seminars, lectures, brochures, retrainings, etc.

[docomo]

hi Dkid ..yung sexual harrasment can come in many forms ;

-oral ~when a person cracks jokes that are sexual in nature.utters words or phrases that have sexual connotations in a jesting manner ; (e.g mani,talong)

-physical ~ when a person touches ,fondles another person's body parts in the guise of accidentally brushing his body or part/s of his body on a person .can also happen in the form of acts or gestures simulating the sexual act .

- with the internet and cellphone,sexual harassment can also take the form of sms messages that have sexual connotations or in instant messages (as in the case of ym, msn messenger or googletalk) depicting or denoting acts which are of a sexual nature.

..of course it would be hard to prove especially when only the two of you were present during the time the said harassment took place. the accused could use as his defense the line that there was no malice intended when he uttered or did the action he is being accused of.

here are some links to sexual harassment topics on the net;

http://www.uml.edu/student-services/counseling/sexual_harass/

http://www.de2.psu.edu/harassment

http://www.army.mil/Soldiers/feb97/features/harass2.html

[Dkid]

hi Dkid ..yung sexual harrasment can come in many forms ;

-oral ~when a person cracks jokes that are sexual in nature.utters words or phrases that have sexual connotations in a jesting manner ; (e.g mani,talong)

-physical ~ when a person touches ,fondles another person's body parts in the guise of accidentally brushing his body or part/s of his body on a person .can also happen in the form of acts or gestures simulating the sexual act .

- with the internet and cellphone,sexual harassment can also take the form of sms messages that have sexual connotations or in instant messages (as in the case of ym, msn messenger or googletalk) depicting or denoting acts which are of a sexual nature.

..of course it would be hard to prove especially when only the two of you were present during the time the said harassment took place. the accused could use as his defense the line that there was no malice intended when he uttered or did the action he is being accused of.

here are some links to sexual harassment topics on the net;

http://www.uml.edu/student-services/counseling/sexual_harass/

http://www.de2.psu.edu/harassment

http://www.army.mil/Soldiers/feb97/features/harass2.html

thanks for the inputs docomo-san.

[Tonyang]

I think Dkid at Docomo iyung dapat nating pag-usapan iyung preventive at paano iyung offensive side na wala kang laban o malabo iyung way na maisusumbong siya. Halimbawa iyung kasamahan mo sa opisina na nakakamuhi dahil mga strategy niyang ginagamit para makatsansing siya.

[Dkid]

I think Dkid at Docomo iyung dapat nating pag-usapan iyung preventive at paano iyung offensive side na wala kang laban o malabo iyung way na maisusumbong siya. Halimbawa iyung kasamahan mo sa opisina na nakakamuhi dahil mga strategy niyang ginagamit para makatsansing siya.

oo nga, medyo mahirap ata yung sumbong, dahil malamang babalik din sa yo. I think awareness maganda siguro. halimbawa posters na may nakatatak na parang 911. I'm sure parang deadma lang ang reaction, pero sa palagay ko, magdadalawang isip yung mga yun.

[Tonyang]

Alam ko na... maglakas loob na tayong magsabi

"what are you doing?"

"is there anything wrong with what you are staring at?"

Yes, magparinig tayo tungkol sa salitang sekuhara sa mga discussion o kung may chance na nagkakakuwentuhan at kasama siya.

Ano sa tingin mo?

Palagay ko effective kung melodramatic. Ikaw nga Dkid... pls suggest.

[mOtt_erU]

......napakalawak ng sakop ng issue na yan...
nakakalungkot isipin pero marami ng nakaranas ng ganyan bagay,
may lumalaban at may mga natatakot....

Sana lang lumaban yung mga babaeng nakaranas ng Sexual Abuse.
Dahil lahat tayo may karapatan bilang tao at bilang mga babae.

[Tonyang]

......napakalawak ng sakop ng issue na yan...
nakakalungkot isipin pero marami ng nakaranas ng ganyan bagay,
may lumalaban at may mga natatakot....

Sana lang lumaban yung mga babaeng nakaranas ng Sexual Abuse.
Dahil lahat tayo may karapatan bilang tao at bilang mga babae.

Paano lalaban sis?

[chepot]

victim of sekuhara..na-experience ko po iyan..di pa masyadong maugong that kind of issue or maybe ignorante ang matatawag sakin..

It happened po 17 years ago...newly married po ako noon and my husband asked me to help them sa family business nila even no read no write pa ako sa nippongo. I could only talk and say a few words pero just enough to converse sa husband ko. Since wala pa akong baby, i thought its a good idea coz makikilala ko ng husto ang mga in laws ko and at the same time, matutu akong magsalita. Kung nasa bahay lang ako, wala akong kausap so, ang progress ko to learn nippongo eh mabagal.

Ang naging work ko at first ay sa tindahan namin and maglagay ng stocks sa mga shelves and ayusin ang mga ito. One time, ako lang mag-isa sa tindahan and may dumating na matagal na customer/client and he told me na he wants the file na nasa itaas . Since di ako marunong maghinapon, thru gestures nalaman ko ang gusto nya. kumuha ako ng ladder and when i was about to get it, he touched my behind..i was shocked..cant say nothing..dont know how to react..buti na lang dumating ang mom in law ko and she was the one to assist him. Wala akong nagawa kung hindi umiyak sa cr and didnt tell my husband coz i dont know how to explain it. Naisip ko lang na ganito ba talaga d2 sa japan or if that man knows that I am a Filipina and sanay sya sa mga homise..? Nalaman ko pa na shacho (president) pa iyon ng isang company kaya, lalo akong na-shock. Ang babaw ng kaligayahan. Di naman pink cabaret ang pinuntahan nya bat ganoon? Napaka decent naman ng damit ko para mabastos..Ganito ba dito talaga? Well, ang ginawa ko na lang, everytime na makita ko yung taong un, umiiwas na lang ako and di na ako nag-aasists. Tumatawag ako ng ibang tao sa tindahan. Nilunok ko ang pride ko that time. I insisted to go sa language school and strived hard to learn ...how to read and write Nippongo. Ngayon sa akin mangyari yoon..i wont keep silent.. i know my rights so, talagang lalaban ako kahit anong mangyari. Awa ng diyos, ung client na yon eh di na bumibili rito and ive heard na nabankcrupt na ang office..(JAMAMIRO!!) :dowave:

One time, may issue regarding sexual harrassment sa news, nasabi ko iyon incident na iyon sa husband ko and he told me bat daw di ko sinabi kahit kanino? I told him that he cant blame me coz of my ignorance sa language. :scratch:

[hayaren]

i've had my share of harassment, siguro halos lahat ng babae dito sa UAE, I suppose.

countless oral and verbal abuses i've encountered along the way, such as men looking at you like you are walking without any clothes draped in your body, a car would follow you on and on until it will stop right behind you and suddenly the window of the car would open and the driver, (of course nationality wise arabic, indian, pakistan are common in these filthy acts) would smile at you, wave at you then say "wanna go for a ride somewhere?" or another pestering act they would do is approach you personally and say, "i wanna be your friend" and beam out that nasty smile:D .....over here keeping quiet leaving that stalker or idiot do his things not just to you but to victim other women that could come across his path, the best way is to reprimand a word from your side. I have learned all the bad words in so many languages to curse these psycho maniac's to drive them away. Worst comes to worst, to call for police assistance if the guy won't stop annoying.

What I wanted to express is that, those women that fall victim to so many types of sexual harassment should speak out and not just kept quiet, fight for your dignity!